technology camp

at work today i whittled down my inbox from 19,649 e-mails to 19,570. true story.

sleeptalk

i just remembered a strange thing that happened last night. i had just barely fallen asleep when i accidentally woke myself by whispering the single word - "beautiful"

comeback kid

they were playing sleigh bells at fred 62 tonight, where i was with che and flossie, eating Chicken Fried Chicken Steak and sippin' the coca-cola. it was rabidly delicious. guess who's back in la, babies

waste land

i think a lot about work, and working. i thoroughly enjoyed reading de botton's the pleasures and sorrows of work and on this workday eve i would like to present this trailer for a documentary i recently watched about these brazilian people who worked in the largest landfill in the world. there is markedly more joy and community there than i've experienced in the american workplace. disclaimer: the documentary is better than this trailer makes it out to be.

from paulius

a friend sent me this to listen to and i think it's great

personal ratio

question of the week - how much, would you say, of you is man and how much of you is myth?
i give myself thirty/seventy

think about it while i go make blini with катя

what is this good for

sleigh bells at the mayan

all i have to say about alexis krauss is that i touched her.

multiple times. last night was great. the opening band was like a trio of Cousin Its. i think i would hide behind a curtain of my own hair too if i had to be an opening act with an impatient and unamused throng of people staring back at me. the lead singer was a woozy girl who made you feel like you'd just given a mic to the drunkest girl at a house party and told her to pretend to audition for woodstock. she kept getting accidentally tangled in all the cords on stage like a crazy octopus. 

i thoroughly thoroughly enjoyed sleigh bells live. they sounded very good but i thought their set was on the short side - a little under an hour. however, i heard all the good songs and anyways i don't know if i could have survived longer. i think i'm really starting to show my age at these music shows. that shit was loud. i had earplugs in and it was deafeningly loud. not that i was surprised - i would generally categorize sleigh bells under the genre of Noisy Music. some young fellas were bragging pre-set about how they weren't going to wear earplugs. "i'm here to see sleigh bells, maan. i'm not going to plug my ears." well, shit i'm glad i did. i remember the days of post-concert tinnitus and i don't miss them. 

i am also decidedly too old for moshing. i vaguely remember the days when how much we were trying to kill each other was indicative of how much we loved the music. now i just want everyone to stand still like decent people so i can properly gaze upon alexis krauss without getting the crap beaten out of me. afterwards i went limping and whimpering back to bagel's with a lump on my leg and right now i have bruises on my arms and legs, a bump on my head, and my left foot is swollen and tri-colored. i haven't been in a crowd of people attacking each other in so long that i forgot the cardinal rule of being in such an environment, which is that you absolutely must tie your shoes on tight beforehand. it's game over if you lose a shoe because the unavoidable next consecutive occurrence is to have your foot broken when someone inevitably jumps on it. so i was trying desperately to keep my sneakers on while jumping with the crowd because if you don't jump, you will be trampled. and whenever i jumped, i would land several feet away from where i had taken off. i repeatedly alternated between all the way stage left to all the way stage right without ever trying to go anywhere. it was like jumping in the waves at the beach. so some elements of the concert experience were unsavory but all that matters is that i touched alexis krauss.

true shred guitar

One of the things I dislike about myself is that when I become extremely excited about something, I feel physically ill, like really nauseous and dizzy. And I am a very excitable person. 

That being said, I might throw up all over myself because I'm seeing Sleigh Bells tonight.

reign of terror has been the only thing capable of tearing me away from the new lana album.

i'm so excited.

whoa

last night after the restorative yoga class my hippie yoga teacher was in the studio's kitchen making "raw" sushi. imagine an incredibly muscular, sort of masculine woman in her 40s wearing a knitted black peruvian hat with the danglies on either side of the head along with an extremely housewifey orange floral patterned apron. she was ladling out portions of a drink she'd concocted - it was like a mysterious brew in a plastic bucket with whole plants and sticks floating around inside. it tasted like toothpaste. meanwhile, she was ranting about what the rest of downtown LA at rush hour looks like from inside her yoga studio. "I just want to stand outside with a sign that says, 'W...H...O...A. WHOA. SLOW THE FUCK DOWN. We're on a planet. WE'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE.'" she then talked about how, while living in Bali, she chucked her cell phone in a rice paddy because she realized, with her phone constantly ringing and her experiencing road rage and worrying about arriving places on time, that she had become too LA.  

the park

lady on the loose today at the park

we are babies and babies r us

this afternoon i went with my brother and my sister-in-law and concomitant flipper baby to set up their baby shower gift registry. i didn't even know gift registries for baby showers existed. as a person with a more-than-medium-sized fear of commitment and settling down, i was completely overwhelmed by this baby mega-mall. on this trip, i learned the full extent of what babies need.

baby must haves: diapers, baby bottles, pacifiers, breast milk pumps, cribs, baby blankets, baby towels, baby robes, baby tubs, crib bumpers, rotating musical crib mobiles, some sort of vehicle to bounce in, some special donut-shaped pillow that they lie on for naps and lying, high chairs, onesies, baby shoes, baby hats, baby books, baby socks, baby mittens, baby dresses, baby tutus, car seats, strollers, bassinets, burping towels, bibs, baby food blenders, teething rings, baby nail clippers, baby humidifiers, baby nasal aspirators, baby wall decals, pianos they can play with their feet, turtles that project stars onto the ceiling, stuffed bears that replicate (poorly, in my opinion) the sounds of the womb, diaper genies, diaper genie liners, baby shampoos, baby body washes, baby lamps, baby night lights, changing table pads, baby wipes, formulas, baby foods, diaper bags, wipes warmers (lest anything cold ever touch baby), baby bottle warmers, baby bottle drying racks, diaper rash creams, baby gates, baby thermometers, outlet covers, corner guards, baby monitors, baby on board sign, baby car window sunshades, strap-on baby carriers, leashes, ad infinitum.

all of this made me long for the times of keeping a baby in a pulled-out drawer of your bureau. baby doesn't mind.

belated official birthday

happy happy birthday to my sweet mama, from whom i get my superb sense of humor

lessons in botany

this is a very delicate operation

unexpectedly advanced root system for such little babies

growing plants from seed may be one of my new favorite activities ever. it's really soul satisfying and beautiful. these are going to be basil.

this is what makes us girls

i am all over the new lana album. i've smudged it with my fingerprints. i've played with it with my toes. i've bitten teeth marks in a heart-shape on it. i've braided my hair around and around it. i've kept it warm under my shirt. i love it.

staten island

a picture erik took of me and mrs. tuckersman a few days ago on staten island

tweets from ai weiwei

Are you a human being if you are not anti-China?

mighty quiet around here

is it lunch time yet

sick in ny. waiting for buca to walk to cobble hill so she mrs. tuckersman and i can eat

currently playing

can i get a sad trombone in here?
wah wah waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

ssnsnsosnosnow

yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

midnight mermaid

this isn't rupaul's best friend race

i suspect that my dad really enjoys watching rupaul's drag race with me

i want to be a snail

In Kazakhstan, an animal cycle similar to the Chinese is used, but the dragon is substituted by a snail (Kazakh: улу), and tiger appears as a leopard.

piano bar

so last night bagel and i went to piano bar in hollywood and right in front of it we passed a tall beautiful youth with curly dark hair standing at a taco truck. he seemed so familiar and i was trying not to look at him while trying to figure out whether i knew him from real life or from my entertainment life. bagel saw him too and he nudged me, so now i knew he was phamus. i started seeing visions of him half-naked in these really sexual scenes and then i realized this was that kid ben from Big Love. we walked into the bar and bagel asked me, did you see Ben?

think your commute is bad?

i'm watching this great show on current tv right now called Deadliest Journeys. i'm watching the episode in the congo, where a fifteen-ton truck, poorly balanced, secondhand from europe and full of passengers and goods, is making its way to another town through jungles and flooded potholes. the truck driver has to send spotters ahead of the truck to suss out the potholes by wading through them because the holes can be up to ten feet deep. it takes them a month to cover four hundred miles.
now i'm watching the episode in china and i feel nauseous from how dangerous this road is

nails, girl

LOVE THESE

here are mine:

grandmother's ring

antsy pantsy

you can measure how restless and rabid i feel by the rate that i churn out inane posts

oh, stuff and fluff

think think think. oh bother.

ten-thirty snack

i ... do believe i would like a macaron from europane right now

and i don't even like meringues, but this looks delicious:

(strawberry)